Ok, so we’re still in the first month of 2019 but that doesn’t mean valuable lessons can’t be learned.
This month has been both hard and enlightening for me. It’s been three months since I left NYC and moved to Johannesburg and sometimes it’s scary waking up and knowing i’m on the other side of the world from my family and friends.
Overall, i’m adjusting but as expected; it gets hard.
The great thing is that 2019 feels different — I am really optimistic about this year. To me, this is the year of blooming.
I’ve been reflecting, documenting and making time for myself. We’re in the last week of January and I realised i’ve learned more lessons in this month itself than in the past few months combined.
In an effort to sharing more about myself and my journey, I thought it would be fitting to share the lessons I have learned this month:
Communication is extremely important
Yea, I know that it’s obvious and i’ve always told myself that communication is super important but I wasn’t actively practicing what I preach. I always expect great communication out of my parter and I had to face the harsh reality that I wasn’t always reciprocating.
How can I expect communication out of someone but not give them the communication that I demand in return?
I recently acknowledged my lack of communication, so this is something I am going to aggressively work on this year.
Trust the process
I am so scared of failure.
It’s one of my biggest fears (along with bugs), but failure is a major part of life. Failure is necessary because without it; you’re not living.
The fear of failing held me back from fully living in my purpose. The lesson here for me is to trust the process. If I fail; brush myself off and nurture my hurt ego then get back up and continue living in my purpose.
Things take time.
Rushing success won’t feel as great as really putting my all into something and then achieving the success I desired.
My friend sent me a talk by the late Myles Munroe (who was a speaker, minister, and author) — my way of thinking has changed since listening to his talk. If you’re struggling with trusting your process or fear of failure, listen to “How To Discover & Release Your Gift To Impact The World”.
I am now going into February and not rushing success (or at least my definition of success).
It’s ok to rest
I don’t know whether it’s because i’m a New Yorker or just overly anxious to succeed, but I felt like I always had to be doing something productive until bedtime. It felt strange to just “chill” because I thought it would hinder me from reaching my goals. I would even feel guilty if I watched more than one episode of a tv show in a day.
After recently thinking about this, i’ve come to the realisation that I have been going through burnouts for years without consciously knowing. Let me explain: I would work lots of hours and then after a few months, I would get really sick. This was happening every year and I now know that I was simply being burnt out.
I’ve read about career and life burnout but didn’t think it would apply to me. Oh, how wrong was I!?
In December, I lost inspiration to paint and create but after resting, I was inspired again and was more intentional about the art I am currently creating.
Now that I know how essential rest is to my progression, I allow myself to indulge in Netflix and to just be.
Sometimes doing absolutely nothing is enough.
Believe in yourself or else no one will
My favourite podcast is Girlboss Radio where entrepreneurs and successful women talk about how they got their start and their road to where they are now. It’s my favourite because I love listening to others journeys for inspiration and motivation to keep going. I noticed that every woman has one thing in common: they believe in themselves.
A person can have the most talent in the world, but if they don’t believe in themselves, they will never reach the success they deserve.
Having confidence in my work and speaking with confidence about my desires is super important to me now. There are people who find success not because of their talent or abilities, but because they believe in themselves wholeheartedly and as a result, the world believes in them too.
You’re not always right
I always think i’m right.
If it seems like i’m not right, I will turn the situation around to assure myself that I was still right (wow, what a toxic trait!) — just ask my boyfriend (he knows first hand).
However, I am not always right (shocker!) and it’s better to admit when i’m wrong than dragging out conflict.
Owning up to when i’m wrong is a sign of maturity and i’m glad to come to this realization before it’s too late.
Do what you love and put yourself out there unapologetically
I read a quote on Instagram the other day saying something along the lines of: the things you enjoy doing most are no mistake — they are all connected to your life purpose.
I couldn’t agree more.
My entire life i’ve loved art, writing, and fashion but wrote those things off as just things I enjoyed and instead pursued a career in television. I worked in film/tv on really cool shows in NYC, but still I was not fulfilled or satisfied.
Since moving to Johannesburg, i’ve been focusing on creating content around my love of fashion and i’ve been painting.
2019 is teaching me to continue doing what I love and then putting it out there to the world. You never know whose watching.
Life is all about learning lessons.
No matter how big or small; each lesson learned is extremely important for self-growth and realisation.
I have a feeling 2019 is going to be filled with lessons I will learn that will contribute to my journey and future successes. I am open, now more than ever, to learning lessons and making mistakes along the way because I know it will only make me a better me for myself and the people I love.
Thanks for reading,